Mother at 19

Becoming a mom at my age was the greatest thing that has happened but also the most difficult. I wanted badly to be the best mom I could be but also have a successful life. Being only nineteen and just being out of high school wasn’t the most ideal time for this. A lot of my family was disappointed in me. Some said “What am I supposed to do congratulate you?” and very few made it seem like a good thing. I was terrified. Having family members that I always looked up to, that didn’t see having a child as a good thing took a lot out of me. The first person to be truly happy for Seth and I, was my friend Danielle. She changed everything. She made me feel like I had nothing to worry about. Seeing her jumping up with joy made everything from my negative family members go away. I focused on that one moment through my whole pregnancy. I cherished that one moment and still do.
Today pregnancy at a young age is frowned upon. Which in my view is funny because in the “old” days it was what you were supposed to do. Get married at a young age and have babies. Being in that position today and getting all the judgements from people made me realize how cruel this world is. It showed me that family isn’t always about being blood related to someone. When you have a major change in your life that is frowned upon at a young age, you are awakened to who is there to support you through the difficult times. Some of the people I trusted most were the ones to tear me down. That was the most heartbreaking part of it. When I needed them the most they weren’t there. I was upset for most of my pregnancy.I had moments where I was really excited but some family members made me feel like I had disgraced the family by starting my own family at 19. I avoided them as much as I could. It was hard to become aware of the people who didn’t support me. I saw nasty sides of some of them that I never thought existed. It was hard to cope with, but I got through it with the support of the few who made me feel good about this major change in my life.
My father and his family was very supportive. They weren’t thrilled my life was being put on hold but they supported me. I am grateful for that. My father had me at a young age. He was upset but also excited to be a grandfather. He stood up for me to some of my negative family members. Although it didn’t seem to change anyone’s view of me I am still grateful he was supportive through it all. No one should feel the way I felt through my pregnancy. It’s a beautiful thing. It’s a gift to have a baby no matter what the age. Do I wish I would’ve waited a little bit longer? Yes, but I don’t regret having my son at 19. It has made me stronger, more responsible, and more aware of the people who truly love me. All together it has made me a better person and gave me the best gift. The gift of being a mom.